in the dark

... wondering.

groping for answers beyond the unseen. looking for ways to reach you. to get through to you.

please don't shut me out. i am willing to work on things. i am going to fight for this.

i need to know. i can't be forever in the dark.

this is it!

the big day of my good friends rox and dom will be tomorrow. so excited! after all the stops and starts, after all these years... these two lovebirds truly withstood the test of time... of patience, long distance relationship, and maturing into a deeper relationship.

my congratulations and best wishes to you both!

eightish

i didn't think i'd be this cheesy again. mushy. feeling giddy.

just plain being in love ♥♥♥

heartbreak

never compare me with your past...


i never did that to you.

this is you now

where has work taken your youth? but then again, its just the hair, i guess. lots of it. can't wait to see the hairless you again.

i'm in dire need of girl bonding! calling my gurlfriends...!

life partners

I’m thinking of what to write lately, and I find myself not being in the mood for anything noteworthy to write about.

Don’t have anything buzzworthy to tell also...

Except, I learned, that my once upon a time flame, who I thought have everything I wanted in a guy and kinda saw a future with, decided to settle with somebody else. Not to blame him though, things didn’t work out between us (for eavesdroppers who might have often visited this site, oblivious to my knowing, yes, things didn’t work out between us, and I’m not totally the one to blame!)… he is just ready to settle down while I am not… with him.

That said, would I really want to settle down, period?

Scary truth… I’m beginning to feel like I want to. Still with mixed and confused feelings, but yes. I want to. And it’s just like what they say… you just feel it. You just realize that you cannot live without this certain person in your life. Never mind the hardships you both might face, never mind the trials that try to keep you apart. Never mind every little thing that comes your way. You just know, deep within you, that he is the only other half that will ever make you whole.

Naïve? Maybe I still am. Maybe my head is still in the clouds, my heart in my hands. But I am now not scared to admit, that I feel this, and I acknowledge it. I still think of the future, though. Still think of what can happen and where things would go. But right now, it’s a liberating feeling… To know that I am capable of feeling this way… and that I have the partner who’s beautifully imperfect for me… ♥

tick tock... tick tock

it's the first day of the last quarter of the last year of the last decade...

i can't believe how time flies by so fast.

it seems like it was only yesterday when 2008 ended, and a new year started...

seems like we were just sitting on the 3rd floor spending the night talking, sharing, waiting for the breaking dawn, watching the trains go by and sharing a cup of coffee.

seems like it was just last night that we were beside each other thinking of a happy future together...

seems like it was only moments ago when you kissed me good bye.


how time flies... and i am yet again, left to thinking how i did all this time...

missing you...

7th heaven & 1 cloud away...

now, isn't he the cutest, most adorable kid? truly lovable! :)

what a looker!

... and i fell all over again :)

will try to post the pic soon!!! (feeling giddy here)

changes (yet again)

it seems to be everywhere nowadays...

... and i don't want to (as much as i can) be sad and in a negative vibe...

... so here i am, trying to put some changes into my life...

... and hopefully learn to embrace them...

insanity

... is ruling over me. i need my sanity back. take me to where i can think freely, shout at the top of my lungs, do whatever makes me happy.

take me to the place where i want to be.

where you are, where we can be together.

take me back in time...


just please, take me...

hues of cerulean

I hear the rain pitter pattering on the roof. I hear the radio buzz with the latest news. I hear the car go by outside. I hear my thoughts shouting at me again.

I have been quite positive lately, been feeling giddy especially last Thursday. I know I have not been the craziest person lately, but darn… one peek at your page, and I let loose all the monsters again.

I am debating with myself right now. I know that you have not been able to access your page and it was not your fault that all those messages came in, that you are not the one corresponding with them, and that you have not been in touch with them for quite a while now. And all those times, I am the one you have given all your attention to. All your time. All of you.

Or, have you? Yes, I believe in you.

Across the miles, oceans apart… distance is a hindrance, but communication is of essence. Make me feel you, make me hear you. Let me know… make me continue believing…

thank you...

...for putting the whole country before yourself. for fighting for us like a mother would fight for her children. for this freedom we are taking for granted now. for your wisdom, your compassion, your heart.

you are the first President I had knowledge of and became aware of. you epitomized a courageous and strong woman. one of high principles and of pure heart.

you are well loved, Madam President. and you will always be remembered. in our hearts, you will always live.

rest in peace, Pres. Corazon Aquino. (08012009)

thinking of you...

i woke up thinking of you. it's almost been a week.

how are you? where are you now? are you thinking of me too?

when will i hear from you? do you still feel the same way as i do?


feel this... can you feel this? my heart beating out of my chest...

only with you... only for you.

With the rain came a dark cloud that seemed to hover over me for the past few days. I have not been in my best moods and have often sulked and cried by myself. Too many things going on in my head, most of which are monsters created by my own doing.

During these darker moments, I’m glad to have my girlfriends around. Thankful for the people who divert me from thinking and worrying too much.

This is what happens when you are lonely and trying to escape from your own miseries.

Thank you, gurlfriends :)

rain, rain...

the heavens are crying with me. i am comforted by the cold, drowned by the rain... my tears unrecognizable in the weather i am in.

i am looking beyond the inexistent. i am holding on to something not quite there. tell me... when? show me... how? touch me... now.

i go through everyday thinking of you... i wish to know you do the same thing too. tell me, you still feel the same. show me... you are still there. touch me... love me again.

hello?

after a couple and more missed calls, i was finally able to talk to him.

nice to hear his voice again.

more so... it was really nice to see him...


love love love video calls :)

40 cents

this (Globe) ad really touched me before, and it still does. maybe because i can relate to it, maybe because i am in the exact same position as the writer. this was shared by my good friend, eli. (credits to ojoe for the picture)

For 40 cents I can create the illusion that you are here.

And I can say hi, I miss you, what time will you be home, I love you, see you tonight.

It's just a silly game we play, pretending that you are working somewhere in this city, that I will see you in four hours instead of four years.

40 cents won't make the oceans contract or the continents move. Heck, 40 days of prayers wouldn't change the distance between me and you. But for 40 cents, I can have you so near I can hear your voice in my ear (closing my eyes, it's as if you were beside me). Give me your spare minutes like spare change jangling in your days, I'm a beggar for your love...

guilty skank

From homaygess in chuvaness.livejournal: “we all have our inner skank, whether we admit to it or not…”

Totally agree. So don’t try to wash your laundry, clean your dishes, or wash your hands in public or whatever and however you do it, thinking that you have a clean conscience; that you are the most noble of them all. He who has not made a mistake cast the first stone. Look at yourself first before you criticize other people.

Good or not, we do have our inner evilness, our inner skanks. Whether you have released this inner being at one point or not, whether you admit to it or not, learn to accept that it is there, that you have it. Y-O-U are not perfect.

And if the skank of another person bit you… it’s ok to be hurt, to get mad. But is it really worth it to get back at that person? Is it really worth holding that grudge against him or her? Again, bear in mind that you also make mistakes. You may not have hurt other people in the process, but it still doesn’t mean that you don’t make mistakes. And it also doesn’t mean that the person who made the mistake is not sorry for doing it, for hurting you. Forgiveness is the key. In time, forgetting will follow.

And if it doesn’t, at least it wouldn’t hurt as much. It wouldn’t kill you again and again. At least, you could’ve moved on…

You would’ve lived.

our game

i was on my way to work. i saw the sign, Jurist BAR Review Center. and i remembered our little game. made me smile, thinking of that happy time together.

bargs and bards, it will be... a funny memory. i'll always remember the way you looked and the way you laughed.

the text message made my day too. it was two good things in one day :)

one week

has it only been 7 days?... feels longer than that.

i am not too crazy about waiting... but i'm still here.

i don't want to question, i'm enduring as much as i can.

i am sad.


i am totally missing you...

one day less

364 days more to go...

leaving... and waiting

The time has come for you to leave. Thank you for spending the remaining days with me…for making me feel loved, for making me feel important.

I’m at the crossroad again, standing still. It’s hard, but I know that this is what you have to do. This is the path we have taken, and this is just the start.

I am standing still, looking. Your gaze held me and told me a lot of unspoken words. The feeling is bridging the short distance between us.

Soon, the oceans and continents will keep us apart.

But, I will be standing still… I will be waiting.

haunted (yet again)

I am haunted again by things that I should have buried a long time ago. Things which were said to me in confidence, with all the trust, and with the hope of acceptance. Things, which I embraced, swallowed, and vowed I will accept.

But why is it that everytime I am reminded of these things, I still feel… hurt, at the very least, disgusted in the larger sense. Why? Because I felt that I have bitten off more than I can chew. Because it felt like I have compromised some of the principles that I have and have traded them for what…? Disgusted, at myself, because they still affect me in ways they should never do.


How much honesty can one take? How much acceptance can one give?

Is it worth measuring?

changes

they have been anticipating this announcement for the longest time. and it will soon come.

i'm freaked by the thought... but i know that it is something i do have to face... one time or another. now or later.

too many changes, and i think my head is starting to spin. i'm such a change-a-phobic. but i still plunge in...

and now, i'm thinking if i made a mistake of entering something that i'm not sure i can stand up for... something i can continue, until the end.

oh, good Lord, please help me... i'm still confused.

******

i folded like a meek lamb again. all my defenses and all my resistance to just accept everything melted with the touch of your hand... i am a fool to just let everything pass.

it seems that you're not listening to me. i'm not whining. i'm not complaining. i am demanding... but for a reason...

don't act so defiant... please compromise...at the very least... please hear me out...

thirdie

where are you?

i'm not mad, but you should've been here...

i understand, but i'm still sad.

you promised... i will be expecting.

time ticking... day dragged on longer than usual.

looking forward... for your return.

runaway (bride)

Im on weddings overload.



Marge and corwyn. Barbs and lloyd. Judai and ryan. Hahaha.

Been thinking about it… was really not the one to think of wedding plans and wedding wants. Not the one to think of eternal commitment. I think I have issues about it. everytime I get too close to the thought of getting married, I shudder, walk out, leave, without turning back. A little too close to reality.

Then why am I even blogging about it? because I’m already at the point where most of my friends are already getting hitched. And it’s just so sweet to see them walk down the aisle in all their glory. They are at their best. So touching to see the guys waiting for them at the altar, all excited to finally be with the one they truly love. I get heart wrenched and teary eyed during the bride’s wedding march. Sappy me.

But this still doesn’t make me want to think of my own wedding. No, not at all.

But what is happening lately? I’m thinking more and more of it. maybe, not just the wedding itself, but getting married. Being forever with somebody, somebody I truly love, I hope. And it’s scary. Because I have no idea where all this is coming from. I am not ready for this open mindedness that I am fast gaining.

I remembered the first time he popped the question on me. it was during one of our rides going home. Everything was still new then. It was just the beginning, we were still getting to know each other. And he asked me, just like that.

And I think that’s when it all started. Well, not really, but it was “when the seed of thought was planted”.

Is he dead serious about it? am I even considering it? we still have a lot to think about, to work on, and to prove to everyone else, even to ourselves. Can I see myself being with him for always? Maybe. but I still have a lot of but’s.

But then again, should I wait for all those but’s to be gone before I even decide on considering it? maybe not him, but the thought?!

Again, I am thinking too much. I am on weddings overload and my mind is going crazy, drifting in between wedding dresses and wedding songs. Too much of this and I think I’m going to barf.

Seriously.


x.s. Why the title? I used to want this to be my wedding march song, if I do get married. But since Judai already used it, I wouldn’t want to be mocked copying her wedding. If, again, I’m getting married. oh and i feel like i am a runaway bride myself....

still the learning part...

I’m just in the need to write my thoughts. Not to analyze, maybe to vent, but more so I can think.

I reread my earlier posts in my other site, and I came across what I read from waitingfortherightbus. On what she learned of about relationships. And I quote, it is not about being together all the time but about finding out your feelings haven’t changed after not seeing or talking to the other person for days (or weeks or a month).

I don’t know how I can just do that. I have been constantly advised by people closer to him that I shouldn’t be too… is naïve the right word? Demanding? I know that I demand too much. Too much of his attention, that is. I am constantly craving for him to show more concern, more care.

Have things changed? I don’t want to think too much and I know I shouldn’t be. It won’t get me anywhere. If so, it will only lead him farther away from me.

How do I get to know these things about you, about us? I have said before that this is the learning part for me. it still is…

I resolved to work things out, I resolved to behave. I know I should start with me. but should I be the only one to work on it? please do your part and meet me halfway. i would love to give my all, I would love to go through it all. But are you there, at the other side, still waiting for me? or have you turned your back and have already walked away?

restraint

so, i resolved to work it out.

and i have to do this right.

otherwise, i'm afraid things will eventually blow up in my face...

***********

time. how much of it does one need?

what for? not to think, don't give me that crap.

not for making a decision, i already did.

and i decided to be with you. i wanted to.

so you see, i don't need time.

... i need you.

bora, baby!

i was hesitant to join my friends at first, thinking of a vacation out of the country instead of the usual summer boracay trip. in the end though, i got convinced. and despite the tropical depression that passed by just days before our trip, we all towed down to the white sand beach of boracay... and as regie promised, had one fab of a vacation!



and i thought the skies will not clear up for us... it was sizzling, hot, baby!



and buddy marc is even hotter, eh? :)

the silver lining

rain is pouring and the weather’s all gloomy… but the nice news is that I have a new nephew in tow! cheers to popo and ghie! am excited to see the new baby in town!

it’s been all good… love love love being with you. there have been many petty quarrels and even more discussions over insignificant things, but making up for all have been worth it. thank you for always making me smile, whatever and however messed up things get to be.

i’ve been hearing songs (from my neighbor) and it’s you i’m thinking of. miss you already…

*****

the way you look at me and the smile on your face makes me want to run to you and to just hold you…

the way you hold me in your arms and the gentle kisses you give me makes me want to drown in your love…forever.

no fancy dinners, no expensive gifts… but more than enough love to make me feel complete…

just YOU and ME… and I know that WE can brave the storms together…

ok, am being "busy". and i just have to try this one out.

yey!!! finally!

already gone...

new lss. that is.

I want you to know
That it doesn't matter
Where we take this road
But someone's gotta go
And I want you to know
You couldn't have loved me better
But I want you to move on
So I'm already gone

but... i am not quite there yet.
i'm still here... and there's no need for either to move on... just quite yet.

**********

2-n-d. second. and it already felt more than that.

**********

been through a lot. fought for much. kept sacrificing. all for love.

**********

all for you.

**********

restless, yet again. back to my old routine. we all are. just in different sides of the world, but we are, again, back in our own trivial maze.

wondering yet again.

it's over too soon...

April’s almost over and I barely felt it! too many things to do, so little time!

Finally, we’re all together! The siblings I love… my warriors…

Been on leave starting the Holy week, thus the temporary hibernation from all my networks. Went home to the province of Romblon. Loved our house! And it was lovelier because we were all in complete attendance. Missed some of my relatives and cousins though, but everything went great! The food, drinks, the party, even the rainshowers came in as a blessing! Nice nice nice… family bonding time it was!


Luau party-turned-under the sea party-originally a marine & lifehouse themed party (whew!)… a birthday surprise for my dad who is now officially a senior citizen, hehe. A reunion of sorts for our family.



pics pics and more pics! we can't quite get enough! here's one of undeniably the prettiest and the cutest among the cousins... of course i have to boost my own ego!

so that's where April went... and she went by too fast! Now, am back to MY routine... hoping to see them again in December...

love love love my siblings... love love love my in laws... love love love my baby... i heart my family. (but where's our pic??? -- will post in a later blog! gosh!)

looking forward to summer...

i can feel the heat...and i'm definitely looking forward to a blissfully burning summer :)

together again

ok, so we’re back on track. Forgive, forget, and move on. past is past. there is always the present and the future.

and tomorrow is definitely something to look forward to!

crash and burn

it was that easy to take away my natural high. it was that easy to make me cry. one message was all it took.

it really hurts to know that you can be deceiving. i hate you for your white lies. i've asked you not to do that to me for there will come a time that i will no longer believe. how dare you put me on a high then push me down just like that.

i fell too fast. i crashed even faster. i've been burned and i don't know how to recover.

how can we get over this? i'm down but i still want to be there...i've been hurt and i want to get over the pain...

making up

you really knew how to make it up to me...

thank you for giving me a natural high :)

togetherness

it’s been 18 days. 4 consecutive days. overnight. looking forward to another day.

intimacy. petty quarrels. making up. the sweetest thing.

LSS – you give me something.

i was meant to tread the water, but now I’ve gotten in too deep
for every piece of me that wants you, another piece backs away
you give me something, that makes me scared alright
this could be nothing, but I’m willing to give it a try
please give me something
because someday, I might know my heart…

i heard...

...

it's really none of my business, but i'm honestly curious... waiting for the details.

i'm numb. less than what you have felt then, i guess. but something struck deep within. regret? torn. wishing? not. hoping? nah...

sad? restless...

********

i'm also sad to hear what happened between my cousin and his girlfriend. i've given him enough warning, but i've encouraged him to hold on. i've been through that, and i know how it feels. but things happen. and as i've learned, some things are just not meant to be...

it's time to wallow... and soon, he'll learn that there will be a time to move on...

case no. 3. underneath it all

you’ve been very short-tempered with me lately. is it me? or am i blaming myself again for something that i shouldn’t be sorry for?

this is me. take me for what i am. i make drama out of everything. i make my own misery. and i can’t help it.

well, i can, really. but i don’t try very hard. because i’m as stubborn as can be.

so please, just bear with me. the more you give me a frown, or the more you raise your voice at me, the more drama i will create. because i can never take it when you do those things at me. and you very well know that.

i may seem to be a willing victim. i may seem to just take everything. but i hurt deep inside. and i don’t want to reach the point where i’ll just give up…

don’t try to win me with your smile. don’t try to melt me with your hug…

do try to listen to me. do try to understand me and please, make an effort to appease me.

this is me. take me as is. love me despite of it. underneath it all…

turning over a new month...

you changed my life…

… in a moment.

“bebe ko? bebe ko… bebe kooo….”

getting picked up from work, cooking together, sleeping together, visiting parents, watching a romantic movie, shopping together (even if it meant a jeepney ride, walking through a thick crowd, smelly streets, and a drizzle), eating together (more like, being fed!), bonding with friends, being interrogated, cuddling, having a fight, making up, a kiss goodbye…

OFFICIALly missing you…

random

i've been acting weird lately, forgive me. i just need to create drama for myself. that is me. that is what i do. and i think it will take some more time for you to figure that one out. and a little more time to accept that. i just need to be heard. i just need to be reassured. i just need to be comforted. forgive me for that. love me for that.

==========

i still have nowhere to go. you just have to stick with me a little longer. don't bother putting me where i'm not supposed to be. don't think that i would love to go as well. but this is making me restless too. but i don't have any control over it. i am not the one to make the decision. i do not have the final say.

==========

it's nice to hear from an old friend. it's nice to catch up and see how things have changed. nice to hear where she is now and that she is happy and doing just fine. she may have found other friends, new friends... but i'll always consider her as one. we have after all, been through a lot and have shared a lot. we may be at different places now, be different persons... but i'll always cherish the memories i have of her...

==========

again, i just need to hear it. i just need to see it, to feel it. i just need to pacify this craziness within me!

==========

you've always put me in your world... and i hope that i can do the same. this is my guilty fault. i hope to work on it. i hope to fight for it...

dreaming of this momentary bliss

I spent the day lying in your arms
Smelling your skin
Cuddled and embraced with your love
Hearing sweet words of affection

Just seeing your smile light up your face
Your glowing eyes focused on me
Your nose pressed against my cheek
Your heart beating against mine

I can drown in this moment forever
I will gladly stay in this sweet surrender… for always…

"gravity"

Something always brings me back to you.
It never takes too long.
No matter what I say or do I'll still feel you here 'til the moment I'm gone.

You hold me without touch.
You keep me without chains.
I never wanted anything so much than to drown in your love and not feel your reign.

Set me free, leave me be. I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity.
Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I'm supposed to be.
But you're on to me and all over me.

You loved me 'cause I'm fragile.
When I thought that I was strong.
But you touch me for a little while and all my fragile strength is gone.

I live here on my knees as I try to make you see that you're everything I think I need here on
The ground.
But you're neither friend nor foe though I can't seem to let you go.
The one thing that I still know is that you're keeping me down

Something always brings me back to you.
It never takes too long...

i crave...

kept thinking about it for the past two days now. i don't know why, but i'm super craving for cuppycakes! i hate not being able to order from my good friend in time for valentines... but, there's always a next time! no need to fret...

but to see something as beautiful as these...

who wouldn't crave???

never give up

"one thing i learned, is that in the face of true love, you just don't give up... even if the object of your affection is begging you to..."

xoxo, chuck bass

long distance

this came at a later time than i needed it... nevertheless, it made me feel sad. i wish i could have told you this sooner...

this long distance is killing me.

(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vYJXna1Z3co)

silent screams

i need to vent but i can't. i want to shout, i want to cry, i don't know what to feel. i'm not in any mood to explain myself, yet i still want to scream at the top of my lungs. i want to cry, but i find no tears coming to the surface. i'm not thinking about anything in particular, but my mind is racing against my thoughts. i don't know what is happening to me, yet i know exactly why i'm feeling this way.

i hate him for not reaching out to me. for not understanding that i have this need to be reassured. that i have this need for space, but not to be abandoned. i hate him for not making any move to contact me. i hate him for being the same stubborn person as i am. i hate him for going out without my knowing, eventhough i know that i don't have any reason to stop him to. i hate him for not saying good night. i hate him for not remembering me, and for making me feel taken for granted.

but i don't really hate him, that i know. i just need to know that he's still there.

on the other hand, i felt bad coz i learned that he turned down my gift. something that was given from the heart. it was something that was bought and given before things got really messed up, but he didn't realize that. he just felt like turning it down because it was given by me. i tried to talk to him through ym, but he ignored me. after that, he went offline. again, i was ignored. i know he's not ready to forgive me, but the least he could have done was to at least say something to me. even if it meant i'll be reading the words "get lost". i hate silent treatment, and he knows that.

again i find myself wandering... i'm in one place but my thoughts are elsewhere. my body is here, but the heart is still looking...

somebody loved

we all have this hope of having somebody to love, who will love us in the same, even greater way, than we do love them.

someday, i hope to find that somebody who will turn me into somebody loved...

Rain turns the sand into mud
Wind turns the trees into bone
Stars turning high up above
You turn me into somebody loved

Nights when the heat had gone out
We danced together alone
Cold turned our breath into clouds
We never said what we were dreaming of
But you turned me into somebody loved

Someday when we're old and worn
Like two softened shoes
I will wonder on how I was born
The night I first ran away from you

Now my feet turn the corner back home
Sun turns the evening to rose
Stars turning high up above
You turn me into somebody loved

surprise!

i heard from him. but he didnt bear any good news.

still mad, as expected. he had glimpsed what i have felt then, he heard the voices from within. of course he was hurt. did he understand? i did not know. probably not. he was only hurt.

i told myself that i didn't do anything wrong by writing. it was the only outlet i have. my only expression of repressed thoughts and muffled cries. i told myself that i can't change that for anyone else.

not all surprises are good. but i believe in looking at the brighter side of things. at least now i'm aware of how he feels. i'm not wondering, i'm not left thinking. i wished to explain, to give assurance. but i know that i will never be in that position anymore. and that my words will only fall on deaf ears.

i was often told to think of happy thoughts. maybe, this lost and confused soul should listen too. happy thoughts to let me get by. but happiness is fleeting, isn't it?

then at least i had the chance to feel it. to be happy. even for just a moment... but until then, i know that i will wallow. i will again go through life dazed and trying to find the way. the same lost and confused soul...

the year that was...

The year that was gave me good memories to remember things and people by. It has given me a wonderful experience of going to different places, seeing and meeting different people, getting to know different cultures, and tasting various flavors of different countries and provinces in the country!

The year that was taught me yet again of loving and letting go. Again, I was faced with the realization that some things are just not meant to be, and not meant to last. I have been at fault at times, but I have given much. I have resisted some, and I have given in to a few. I have been the crazier version of me. But at times, I felt like I have glimpsed of another person I can be.

The year that was made me see things. Not at all clearly, but definitely shaped out visions of things I have hoped, wanted, and would like to achieve and attain. It made me see different options and made me want to actually take a step further.

And it’s time to say goodbye. To let go of some things. To let go of 2008. It came fast and went by just as quickly.

And it’s time to embrace the now. To accept the reality that another year has gone by, and that it’s now time to move on.

********

i will never let you fall
i'll stand up with you forever
i'll be there for you through it all
even if saving you sends me to heaven...

'cause you're my...
my true love, my whole heart
please don't throw that away
'cause i'm here for you...
please don't walk away and,
please tell me you'll stay...

-- from my guardian angel

unexpected

i was there and so was you...
but it's as if the distance never disappeared.
no bridge nor road,
will ever close the gap between us.

i can't demand, i cannot ask...
for i know the consequences now...
i will smile and i will nod...
for i see that you are doing just fine...